Sexual Orientation
from: http://sexualityandu.ca/parents/puberty-5.aspx
It is not uncommon for children to have strong feelings for people of the same sex. It is helpful to discuss sexual orientation in terms of thoughts, feelings and activities:
- Some boys and girls will experiment sexually with peers of the same sex as part of their curiosity about sex.
- Some boys and girls will have sexual dreams about someone of the same sex
- These feelings are normal and do not necessarily indicate their sexual orientation
In addition, it is important to keep in mind that:
- Some boys will know that their sexual interest has always been to boys and some girls will know that their sexual interest has always been to girls
- Some boys and girls may be uncertain and want to wait and see what happens over the next few years and some boys and girls may want to talk to someone
- For some people, sexual orientation is often not completely clear until adulthood, but some teens are quite clear about it and want to have this aspect of themselves accepted.
How to talk about sexual orientation:
- It is VERY important to stress the fact that people enjoy a variety of relationships
- Talk about different kinds of families (not only those that are headed by same-sex couples, but also those headed by single parents, extended family, etc.) and focus on the caring and affection people show - not their sexual orientation.
- If your child uses a gay stereotype, treat this as a teachable moment. Refer to democratic values such as respect for self and others, equality, and justice to address stereotypes, harassment and put-downs.
- Talk about famous people they may admire who are openly gay, e.g. Elton John or k.d. lang.
- Visit www.pflag.ca, a web site for friends and families of those who are gay, lesbian or bisexual (GLB)
