Here for You

Sexual Health and Holistic Health

from: YOUNG EAGLES’ CHALLENGE: A Peer Education Training Manual for First Nations Youth on HIV/AIDS and Related Issues

Sexual health is not easy to define because each human being is so different from the next. Sexual health is much more than how healthy our sexual and reproductive organs are. Everything in our lives affects our health because we are interconnected with all of Creation.

Maintaining a balance between the physical, emotional, spiritual and mental aspects or our experiences creates a healthy First Nations person. If we allow one of these four things to get out of balance, we can experience ill health.

The Medicine Wheel has been used by many First Nations people for thousands of years and may be a good model to apply to any aspect of our health, including sexual health. It is also useful to recognize that some First Nations may not use the Medicine Wheel today. The following Medicine Wheel can be used as a teaching tool to talk about balance, life, responsibilities, about gifts and of life cycles. For communities or individuals who choose not to use the Medicine Wheel, this information can still be presented without having to use this visual exercise.

The Medicine Wheel starts in the east where the sun rises and the day begins - which is why this direction also refers to the infant stage. Just as the sun travels, we next look south, as with life and move from infancy to being a youth. Then we continue in a clockwise direction looking west, which we refer to as the adult stage of life. Lastly, we look north, and to the wisdom of Elders. This same Medicine Wheel can be used to teach about the stages of the HIV virus, or about sexual development because it covers all four main stages of life. Some examples follow and more examples about how to teach this is found later in this section.

For example, when applying it to HIV, the infant stage is when a person becomes infected. The youth stage is when the body begins to feel the affects of the virus and may experience some health warnings. The adult stage is when the person has had HIV for awhile and may be struggling with many health setbacks. The elder stage is when a person develops full-blown AIDS and begins to face the possibility that their time in this world may not be plentiful.

When talking about sexual development, the same cycle or wheel can be used to explain what happens during the Infancy stage to the body. The youth stage can be talking about puberty and the physical changes that a youth goes through. Girls begin their moon-time (menstrual periods) and guys have their voices change, among other things. The adult stage can be about parenting, marriage, and responsibilities of being in an intimate relationship and about commitments. The elder stage can be about
menopause including male menopause and how relationships may change to being non-sexual. And so the cycle of life continues. We all have one common mother and that is Earth. We are forever connected to her and so it makes sense that the state of Earth's health affects the health of individuals, our families, our communities and all things around us. The air we breathe, the water we drink and the food we eat from the land all affect our health. This is a holistic view of health.

Changes that happen to us in the transition from youth to adult can be a real challenge. Boys' voices get lower, girls' breasts begin to develop and we start growing pubic hair. We are slowly transforming from youth to adult. These changes affect us physically but also emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Strong feelings of sexual attraction to others which are new to teenagers and young adults can be difficult to deal with. How we think of ourselves can change too. Most of us begin to wonder whether we are attractive to the guys and/or girls we have been thinking about. In the midst of these feelings, a young person may be more vulnerable or prone to try various substance use, such as drugs and alcohol, to help make us feel more comfortable or less shy. There are concerns when this happens, which are discussed later in this section under Sex, Drugs and Alcohol.

Our minds and how we think of ourselves and the world around changes as we reach this growing stage. Spirituality is a big part of sexuality as well. Traditionally, in First Nations cultures, our sexuality was considered a gift from the Creator as a way of sharing pleasure with our partner and also a way to be gifted with children. Many religions teach that sexuality is something to be shared by two people who are married for the purpose of creating families. Sexuality affects what we do, how we feel about ourselves and others, what we think and how we experience our connection to the Creator. Sexual health is a good thing. Before first contact with Europeans, First Nations people commonly used traditional ways of educating infants, youth, adults and elders about sexual health through stories, songs, ceremonies, rituals and teachings of roles and responsibilities. Over the last 500 years many of our old ways changed and our overall health has been negatively affected. The role of the residential school system, the decline of First Nations languages, limited access to our traditional use of the land, the food we eat, and even racism continues to affect our holistic health in negative ways.

But humor and love remain with us and keep us strong. It is only with deep love and respect for ourselves and others that we can adapt and remain strong and healthy. We have never lost the ability to laugh about ourselves and our situations. With love and humor we can heal and reclaim what has always been ours - the health of each individual, our families, our communities and Earth herself.

Holistic health goes further than our personal experiences because we know that we are intimately connected to everything that exists on Mother Earth and the entire universe. Sexual health is woven into holistic health in the same way. We each experience our sexual feelings in unique ways.

Intimacy

True intimacy is not just about physical sex and touching each other. It is about talking openly about who you are, what you like, your fears and your needs. It is not just about having sex. In fact, you can have true intimacy without having sex because it involves being open and honest with someone and sharing a very private part of you. It involves trust and earning trust.

STAGES OF THE MEDICINE WHEEL:
INFANT, YOUTH, ADULT, ELDER

Human sexual development normally happens in stages as we age. Many of us are not used to thinking about infants, teens or Elders being sexual, but it is a fact of life that we must look at. Traditionally we are taught that human sexuality is a sacred gift from the Creator. Sexuality begins as soon as we are born and we continue to be sexual beings until the day we draw our last breath.




Infant (infant, toddler, child)

Infants and babies need to feel that they are cared for. A parent's or care-giver's love and caring is very important. Snuggles and hugs, calm surroundings, bathing, talking softly, providing comfortable clothing, feeding and diaper changing are all ways that we show our love for our babies and toddlers. Even as babies, the connection between our genitals and our brains is already established. Any kind of infant care that involves touching the genitals can stimulate sexual feelings in babies. Infants will not have sexual thoughts or images when they become sexually stimulated, however, they can and do experience pleasure. To them, it simply feels good. At some point, an infant will discover that by touching themselves they can experience pleasure. This is a common stage in our sexual development. This is also how we first learn to trust and enjoy human connections.

Youth (youth, adolescent, teen)

In the youth to teen stage of life we continue to develop sexually. At an early age children become curious about how their bodies work. For example, often children begin to wonder about where babies come from or they may ask about the family dog who they saw humping another dog. It is very important for children to be able to ask questions and get simple, honest answers from the adults in their lives about what is going on. This can be a good time to pass on a traditional teaching or story that helps explain the cycle of life from birth to death or to use religious teachings that deal with these topics. It's important that the child feels that he/she can talk about these sexual thoughts and feelings with the caring adults in their lives.

Talking about the cycle of life, reproduction and sexual health is also a good opportunity to teach the child the difference between right and wrong. For example, a child can be taught what kind of touching by an adult is right or wrong. A child who has already talked with an adult about healthy touching is much more likely to tell that adult about sexual abuse. They will have established trust, language and background to use for talking about sex. If a child feels shame talking about sex, they will not likely reach out for help when they run into trouble. Children who can't talk about having been sexually abused often feel that the abuse was their fault and keep it a secret for many years leading to sexual ill health. Sexual abuse is never the victim's fault. Sex education is one of the best ways to protect a child from sexual abuse.

Between the ages of 9 and 14 most people begin to experience puberty. During this time, our bodies are flooded with powerful sex hormones which cause physical changes. How we think and feel change too. Some of us wonder if we're the only ones going through changes and without someone to talk to, sometimes we feel alone, isolated and vulnerable.

Sometimes we become physically and emotionally attracted to others of the opposite and/or same gender and we have a lot of feelings and thoughts that we don't understand. Getting sex information from friends or peers can be a good thing but a lot of times the information we get from friends is not based on fact.

With any gift, including the gift of human sexuality, there comes roles and responsibilities. During puberty we become intensely aware of our sexuality but what do we do with these thoughts and feelings? We spend a lot of time thinking about it. There are worries, questions, hopes and dreams that can seem overwhelming such as: "Does she like me?", "When will my breasts grow?", or "Am I a pervert for feeling this way?" Once the physical changes of puberty are well under way and a teenager begins to enjoy some of the roles and responsibilities of young adulthood, a different set of concerns begin to come into play. For example: sexual intercourse for the first time (when, what, where, who and how?); Should I wait until I'm married?; What about STI's, HIV/AIDS and pregnancy?; What do other people think about me?; Will anybody ever fall in love with me? These issues will be addressed further on in this section. These questions can be good topics to discuss in Talking Circles or with a Counsellor.

Adult (adult, older, parent, senior)

Adulthood or the adult stage means that people have lived long enough to gain what is called life experience. It also includes responsibilities and growing from past mistakes. It is about being mature and taking ownership of your choices. Adult choices include issues like: reproduction (having and raising children); fulfilling our sexual lives; teaching or sharing about how to live life to the fullest. The adult stage also includes being a rotector, a role model, showing love and care for others.

Adulthood is about being a provider, doing proper family planning (when to raise children), and, living an active role in the community. The adult stage is about being a worker, a warrior in that they defend things that are right and good for the community. Adults can be nurturer's and caregivers. That is if they are healthy and are not engaged in negative behaviors such as substance use that interferes with these roles.

Elder, (Elder, grandfather/grandmother)

Lastly, the elder stage is like the adult stage. Elders are Traditional Teachers, Keepers of Knowledge. They can be care-givers and story tellers. They continue providing or sharing their Teachings (depending on their health). Elders are our policy makers, historians, stabilizers and mediators because they know enough from living a long life that they can be called upon to correct situations. They were our Treaty Makers when Treaties were being negotiated with Canada. Despite misconceptions, Elders can continue to enjoy sexual pleasures, depending on health and the situation. Elders do not have to worry so much about pregnancy, as older bodies no longer can conceive a child because of menopause and other factors, like diabetes. There is a difference between Elders and senior citizens. Elders generally have gained a standing in the community and are respected and seen as having wisdom. A senior citizen may be old by age, but may not always have the same standing in the community, for different reasons, such as a dependency on substances or they simply do not meet that role.